I came back to a bunch of work. A lot of stuff going on.

Barely have time to even think about eating. Last week was a mess. Didn’t eat very much or properly. Didn’t binge however. And didn’t really eat unhealthy stuff. For two days I had to survived lunch by munching on apples. That sort of thing.
My brother told me he has lost all the weight he gain on the ship. I haven’t weighed myself since the time after the cruise (197 lbs). I didn’t particularly feel thin. But not too fat either.

Didn’t get to exercise at all. I am still at my peak. I need to get into the 180’s in October, otherwise, I’d be a fat pig going back to Malaysia to celebrate Chinese New Year, which ironically is the year of the Boar, which doesn’t sound as fat as a Pig. Asian people, my family, my friends, mostly think that I’m fat.

I sometimes feel bad whining about my fat. I know there are people who have more to lose. I know Andy does. I know Vincent does. What about you Mike? Based on my 197 lbs mark, I want to lose, fuck, 20-30 lbs. But I shouldn’t feel bad. The last 20 to 30 sometimes are the bitches. And we all connect by fat.
On Archer Radio today, I heard him talking about using the “I’m fat” as a defense mechanism. A way of telling the world that I’m fat, so that people know that I realize I am fat, and mostly, when people tell me I’m fat. It doesn’t hurt as much, because I am already telling myself that.

Sounded kinda sad. But that’s the truth.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, September 19th, 2006 at 2:51 pm and is filed under John. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.